[M]y own experimenting, and the sometimes interesting reactions I get to it, show that it's kind of easy to get hung up on forms, forgetting that forms are skillful means that may or may not fit the situation at hand.
Nathan's right. People function with a HUGE number of stereotypes and preconceptions. And the problem is, it's ridiculously easy to see how they are operative in other people. On the other hand, we, (in the sense of "We are not amused," a.k.a., the Royal We) do not have any. None at all.
In fact, we believe we can even see through our prejudices, stereotypes, and preconceptions, even if we did have them. Which of course, we don't.
Hell, we practice Buddhism, right?
Even if we notice ourselves conforming, operating, or reacting to some prejudices, stereotypes, and/or preconceptions ("PSP") we can alleviate the effects of the training and conditioning that give rise to PSP with our zazen and mindfulness, right?
Can not you see where I'm going here?